A couch potato

Mom: Chris, are you still in bed? It’s almost noon.

Chris: Who cares? It’s the weekend. I can sleep in.

Mom: You always lie around the house like a couch potato.

Chris: Come on, mom. Don’t give me a hard time.

Mom: Alright, you asked for it. I’m cutting off your allowance!

Chris: But, Mom … that’s unfair!

Mom: It servers you right. Maybe it will teach you to not be so lazy.

A short fuse

Carol: What’s wrong?

Paul: I just made a huge mistake. I accidentally told my boss to shut up!

Carol: What?! Why did you do that?

Paul: I lost my temper. You know I’ve got a short fuse.

Carol: Yes, you’re infamous for that. You have to learn to control your temper.

Paul: I know, but when I see red, I can’t help myself.

Carol: Hey, don’t blow your cool. It might cost you your job.

That’s just superstition

Anne: Be careful!

Ellis: What’s wrong?

Anne: Didn’t you see that black cat in front of us? That’s bad luck.

Ellis: Hey, come on. That’s just superstition.

Anne: No, it’s true. We should cross the street, just in case.

Ellis: Do you really believe all those old wives’ tales?

Anne: Well, it can’t hurt. Better safe than sorry.

Chip on your shoulder

Interviewer: Congratulations on the win. You were the top scorer tonight.

Player: Thanks. I’ve worked very hard for this.

Interviewer: What drives you to play so well?

Player: When I was young, everyone told me I was too short to play basketball. So now, I work extra hard to prove them wrong.

Interviewer: That’s a very inspiring story.

Player: Yeah, I guess I have a chip on my shoulder.

Face the music

Mr. Henson: Everyone, out latest movie was a bust.

Ms. Clarke: You’re right. I think it’s time we cut our losses and pull the movie from theaters.

Mr. Henson: How could this happen?

Ms. Clarke: We need to face the music and admit the director has just lost his touch.

Mr. Henson: You may be right. He’s a nice person, but the bottom line is that he’s just not popular with audiences anymore.

In the red

Alice: Dan, we’ve got problems.

Dan: What is it?

Alice: This is the third month in a row that we’re in the red. We’ve got to face the facts.

Dan: I know. I’m worried too. There are too many empty seats these days.

Alice: If this continues, I’m afraid we might go bankrupt.

Dan: Don’t worry. We’re just going through a rough patch.

Think outside the box

Ms. Roberts: We need to find a way to sell more PCs.

Mr. Gardner: I know. But the market is slow these days. There’s not much we can do.

Ms. Roberts: I don’t buy that. We just have to come up with some original ideas.

Mr. Gardner: You’re right. We need to think outside the box.

Ms. Roberts: I think we should try to improve our marketing strategy.

Mr. Gardner: You’re right. It’s not too late. We can still turn this company around.

Break the bank

Mrs. Baek: Honey, I think we should buy a new car.

Mr. Baek: What a coincidence, I’ve been thinking the same thing! But I don’t know if we can afford it.

Mrs. Baek: How about buying a used car? That way, we won’t have to break the bank.

Mr. Baek: A used car? Do you think that’s a good investment?

Mrs. Baek: Sure. Why don’t we visit the dealership on Monroe Avenue? They’re having a clearance sale these days.

Put in a (good) word for me

Janine: I’m going to my interview today. How do I look?

Larry: Don’t worry. You look fine.

Janine: Thanks. I guess I’m just nervous.

Larry: Don’t be. I’ll talk to the boss and put in a good word for you.

Janine: Will you really? Thanks so much for the recommendation!

Larry: My pleasure. It’s the least I can do.

I bet

Warren: Hey, do you see that girl over there? I bet I can get her number.

Freddie: What? No way. She’s out of your league.

Warren: Are you sure? Then put your money where your mouth is. Bet me 10 dollars!

Freddie: I’ll take that bet! That’s easy money.

——— Warren goes over, and soon comes back with the girl’s phone number ———

Warren: [smiling] Ten dollars, please.

Freddie: [handling over the money] Damn, how did you do that?

Warren: That girl I talked to … she’s my sister!